WHAT ABOUT KEVIN?

Well I know some folks read my last What About Kevin? post and believe me I appreciate the text messages, thoughts and concerns. So now I have a reprise but this time with a slight hint of enigma you might not be expecting. This is all in regards to the aftermath of my last post and how my thoughts have changed.

In my previous post things were dark, life was gloom and stress was this insurmountable mountain of pain, weakness, disbelief and most all anger at the world, myself and anyone else I could blame.

Now my move is complete and I had two interviews this past Friday all presenting themselves as great opportunities. It is amazing how the coin can flip and life turns quickly. I will not mention the company names here but one is a pretty huge brand name with an amazing opportunity.

So what about Kevin? Last week it seemed the walls were closing in on all facets of my life, and the truth is they were. But what I never failed to realize is that life is just one giant random enigma of puzzling circumstances we can never get an answer for, whether you believe in God, or aliens or whatever, there are just little dots of happenings in our lives that don’t make sense and never will.

So now when I ask the question what about Kevin? I don’t seek an answer, I just point to the randomness of life and remember that whatever the reason I will be better off because of it in the long run. Thinking like that is awesome because it just shuts out the pain, weakness and frustration. I have realized that everyone goes through something like this in there life. It is the chaos, the weak moments, these orbs of loneliness and self doubt that make us who we are. You learn something about yourself in these times. So what if I have to crash at my parents house for a month. Instead of choosing to look at the upside, like my parents will let me crash here, or that they have room for me, most people don’t even get that. I chose to throw a middle finger at the world. I chose to look at it in the way of “oh the girl I am dating won’t like me anymore because of it, who would?”

I selfishly wrote about my “relationship” not realizing how nice it is to have someone to go on a date with, so many people struggle to find even that.

Newsflash to myself, you can’t think like that last post did. You can’t let the pain and stress get to you. I am not much of a spiritual person, I try to be, I go through phases where I am all in and then my doubts creep out but I suppose that is what it is all about, faith. Faith in something, someone, a higher power is the only thing that will combat these weak moments. We are meant to question, we are meant to thirst for the answers but without hope, without faith in something, the weakness and stress will never waiver.

So What About Kevin? Well he will be fine because he is back on the track of YOK (Year of Kevin) and whatever happens will happen. I am just not going to be negative anymore. Didn’t they say in Jurassic Park that “life finds a way?” well I have no about mine will find it. Sure sooner would be better but patience…well that is whole other post. By the way if you are ever stressed go run, it is literally the best therapy in the world.

Peace out homies!

~KC

Someone once said “life moves pretty fast and If you don’t stop and look around once in awhile you might miss it.” Ferris Bueller was right but what if life slows down when you don’t want it too? At the ripe young age of 27 I am in the midst of a quarter life crisis. This crisis is a mixed bag of passion changes, unemployment, career shifts, relationships and most of all figuring out the answer to the question What About Kevin?

Recently I have been watching the short lived dramedy produced by J.J. Abrams called What About Brian? The show revolved around a group of thirty-somethings, particularly Brian, who is at a crossroads in his life while his friends push forward in their relationships and careers, he seems to not be able to break the mold. I sympathize and empathize with the character considering what I am going through. As I write this post, I am packing all of my stuff shoving it in storage and crashing at my parents house for a couple of months. Who in their right mind wants to do that? At twenty seven? Shit I never would have imagined. As far as my love life is concerned consider it on hiatus once again. I have been dating this girl for a few months but it will end sooner or later, most likely sooner. She is great but the phrase bad timing seems to fit the best when describing our dating period.

So what about Kevin? What about my next stop? My core group of college friends, the guys who are my future groomsmen, they are all engaged, their careers are solid and taking the next step. Me? I am moving into my parents house, no solid job in sight. My Memphis friends, one is going to law school the other is moving into a house and becoming a full fledged and full time paramedic. My other friends are all finishing graduate school or pharmacy programs, starting their own businesses. Again, What about Kevin?

What about me? When do I get the cool job? When do I find the girl who is actually interested in me? When do I get to say “you know what I am happier now than I have ever been?” I know this post is one long bitchfest, I know that people in this world are worse off than me, what is their really to complain about? So what! This isn’t them it is me, this is my life. I can complain, selfish I know but if don’t then it just becomes one giant internalized mess. So what about Kevin?